The Churchill Files
by Cestrescir
Summary: Winston Churchill was a very interesting man, and England met him more than once. Rated T because Iggy might swear.
1. File 1

Hello! A while back, I found one of my mother's books on Churchill (she has this strange obsession with the man. It doesn't help that I'm going to a school named after him, either.) and I came across a few funny quotes. So, I wrote some one-shots.

I call them...the Churchill files! ---insert evil laughter here

Well...I hope you enjoy the first file.

Disclaimer: I don't own Hetalia. Do I seem insanely awesome to you?.....I didn't think so.

**Yes, Even England Can Get Grounded**

It was a very nondescript day in England. But that didn't matter. Arthur Kirkland wasn't outside.

Arthur sighed, reluctantly closing his book as someone began to speak. It was good manners, no matter how much he wanted to keep reading, and a Gentleman was always polite. The man standing droned on and on, and Arthur's eyes wandered slowly around the room.

Germany was on the rise, and he was confined to the House of Commons. Petty squabbles and long-winded, boring speeches took up most of his day. Basically, Arthur had been grounded.

It was actually amazing how the Queen could _ground_ her own _country_, as much as he hated to admit.

Still, it was rather embarrassing.

He was to show up at the House of Commons for every meeting, on time. He wasn't allowed to touch a glass of alcohol, much less set foot in a pub. Those were the terms.

The last term, Arthur could deal with. Alcohol was what had gotten him into this mess, in the first place. He doubted he'd drink _any_ for a while, even if he wasn't grounded. (A/N: Fat chance!)

Green eyes narrowed.

The first term, however, was a bit harder to handle.

Arthur blinked, realizing that someone else was speaking, now. He'd missed the first part of the meeting.

Oops.

If the queen found out he'd been day-dreaming, she'd--

Arthur shook his head angrily. Bloody hell! It wasn't as if the woman was his mother! What on Earth was he thinking?

"Sir Kirkland?"

England looked up to see---to his embarrassment---that everyone was looking at him curiously. He really needed to pay more attention.

"Is something the matter?"

England cleared his throat awkwardly. "Er...no, no. Carry on."

Half an hour later, he wished he hadn't said that. The same man had been droning on and on for the last twenty minutes, and Arthur was about ready to climb the walls, his leg bouncing impatiently beneath the table.

Suddenly, the speaker cleared his throat.

Everyone was silent.

The man cleared his throat again, and when nothing happened, he sighed. Wondering why he'd stopped, Arthur followed his line of sight to find one Winston Churchill relaxing in his chair, eyes closed.

"_Must_ you fall asleep while I am speaking?" the MP demanded.

Churchill shifted slightly.

"No," he replied, eyes cracking open. "It is purely voluntary."

Arthur's head hit the table with an audible _thud_.

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Well...? How was it? Good? Bad? Total garbage? Please tell me what you think. I'll post the next one as soon as I can.

In case anyone was wondering (at least, my sister was when she first read this.) and MP is not medical personnel. XD I know its stupid, but that's the first thing that popped into my head when I saw the two letters side-by-side. An MP is a Member of Parliament. I tell you this, so you won't have to feel as stupid as I did. If you already knew, then more power to ya!

Yay! Canada beat the US, in hockey! I was so happy. I'll bet nearly everyone was watching that game. Sid the Kid is my hero. Lol

Was anyone watching the men's curling game? Canada beat Norway. It was very heartwarming at the end. Johnny Mo looked so happy...

Anyways, thanks for reading! And please review. Until next time! :D


	2. File 2

This came fast. I guess that's what happens when you're up at 1am with nothing to do.

Wow, I didn't think anyone would actually like my Churchill files all that much. Thanks to all who reviewed! --Gives hugs--

By the way, in case I forgot to mention, or you just need warning....yeah, these are basically a bunch of oneshots. Sorry. I'm just trying to type up all the oneshots I've had sitting in my journals. Then I promise I'll put up a nice multi-chapter story. Okay~?

Oh! And before I forget, these aren't in chronological order. BEWARE!

**Winston was going Door-to-Door, England was going Home**

Arthur walked down the street, humming softly to himself. It was mid-afternoon, and a bit on the cloudy side, but it wasn't supposed to rain. Not according to the weatherman, at least.

Not that he _needed_ a weatherman to tell him that. Arthur could do it himself. It was _his_ weather, after all. Still, most of his faeries had stayed home, feeling iffy about the clouds. Only on or two followed England home, now.

The country was also eager to get home, since his grocery bags were starting to feel a bit heavy...

Arthur blinked and stopped walking when his two tiny companions started to tug lightly on his hair, trying to get his attention. They fluttered around his head, eventually directing his attention to a scene that made him blink.

Winston Churchill, one of the men running for office, stood outside a home.

'_He must be going door-to-door,_' Arthur realized. '_Asking for votes._'

England watched curiously, the weight of his groceries forgotten, as Churchill knocked on the door. After a moment, the door opened to reveal a slightly disgruntled-looking man.

Churchill politely introduced himself, and the man immediately scoffed.

"Vote for you? Why, I'd rather vote for the devil!"

Arthur frowned at the man's rude remark, but Winston Churchill seemed unperturbed.

"I understand," Arthur heard him reply calmly. "But in case your friend isn't running, may I count on your support?"

England nearly dropped his groceries.

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Well, folks! There you have it. The latest Churchill file. I'm actually pretty sure that this one took place some time _before_ the first file I put up, but...

Yeah, like I said, not in chronological order.

I'm sorry its so short. That's just kind of how they've all turned out, so far. I just find a quote, and do my best to fit Iggy in as an observer. Its actually kind of difficult when you have no background to where Churchill said the quote, when he said it, or why.

Oh, well. I'm managing. Anyway, I hope you all like the next one! That one should be up pretty soon, too. Uploading may slow down, though due to exams. O.o


	3. File 3

Yes! I'm finally typing up the third Churchill file. Once again, these aren't in chronological order. They're just kinda...yeah.

I thought I'd get this one in before I went to school, so its slightly rushed. Sorry, sorry.

Yeah, I apologize, alot.

This one was a bit harder for me to type up, so its much shorter. Sorry. I had to come up with more of a story to go behind it and everything.

Anyway! You're all probably sick of reading my babble...if you're even reading it. So, on with the show! Fanfiction. Whatever.

Enjoy~!

**Churchill, after touring the U.S. In the 1930's**

When they'd first arrived, it seemed like everything would be fine. In fact, Arthur thought he might even enjoy his visit to America.

What the _bloody_ _hell_ was wrong with him?

By the second day, he was already fed up with Alfred. He wanted to go home. _Now_. Preferably never leaving his own country again.

When the idiot had seen Winston Churchill, he'd snorted at some rude thought and England had promptly smacked America on the back of the head. Unfortunately, that had started the whining. Just the fact that Alfred had even opened his mouth had ruined Arthur's day.

England could have been happier to get away, when they finally left America. He was so relieved, thinking he'd finally get some peace and quiet...

There really _must_ have been something wrong with him.

He'd completely forgotten about the press.

Soon after landing, Arthur found himself nearly wishing he was back in America, but quickly dismissed the thought with a sharp mental slap.

Still...he was in no mood to deal with the rabid reporters, so he tried to stay at the back of the group of home-comers, so as not to draw attention to himself. He almost wished he was Matthew for a moment. That boy was rather good at not being noticed.

Lucky for England, Churchill seemed to have the press problem covered.

The man answered the rapid-fire questions with relative ease, and Arthur could only stare in awe. Then, one reporter managed to push to the front.

"Mr. Churchill, do you have any criticism of America?" the reporter asked quickly.

Churchill huffed a bit before answering. "Toilet paper too thin! News papers too fat!"

Arthur promptly burst out laughing.

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So, how was it? Told you it was short. Once again, sorry. I thought the quote was pretty funny, though, so I did my best. Now its time to search for a new one!

Thanks again, to all who reviewed! You're all awesome~!


	4. File 4

Hello again. Yes, its Chester. Good to be writing.

Those last three files I had pre-written, so this latest one is seriously brand-new. .

I know, amazing, eh? Anyways, I'm finally putting in a quote that will allow me to write bit of what I think Iggy thinks of Churchill. I know some of you have been looking foreword to that, so I hope you all like it~!

**You Call This Relaxing?**

It was a fairly pleasant evening in England, and the weather was quite nice, much to Arthur's delight. He and a few others had been invited to dinner by Winston Churchill. Arthur was actually looking foreword to it.

Winston Churchill was an interesting character. The type of person England had only ever met a few times in his long life. He was charismatic and quite witty. A great combination, though the later tended to make people a bit...displeased.

Like Alfred. The younger country still whined about a comment Churchill had made to the papers in the nineteen-thirties. Arthur wished the idiot would just _get over it_. It had been a decade ago, no need to keep fussing over it.

Arthur shook his head, clearing the thought of Alfred from his mind as he finally arrived at his destination. He wasn't late, a gentleman never arrived late, but he wasn't the first to have arrived. Just how he liked it.

As he came in, he heard Churchill talking to one of the other guests. The man was chatting about his plans to take a vacation soon.

"I want to go, but I can never seem to find the time..." the man was saying.

Churchill seemed amused. "There is never a good time for a vacation, so take one anyway," he advised.

Arthur smiled, chuckling softly. It sounded like dinner was off to a wonderful start.

The rest of the evening was spent in a rather unusual, but entertaining way. It was actually the first time Arthur had spent an afternoon tinkering with, then testing a model bomb.

It was much more exciting than the country had thought it would be. It was also quite satisfying when they were finally able to make it go off, a safe distance from any buildings.

After testing the bomb, Arthur followed the others back to the house, hanging back a bit with a content smile on his face. He really had to do this more often. Dinner alone, and dinner with faeries was never quite this fun. His smile widening, Arthur sped up slightly and chatted along with the others.

When they got back, England was content to sit and relax with everyone else.

Churchill seemed to like the idea as well. He turned to Arthur and observed; "This is one of those rare and happy occasions where respectable people like you and me can enjoy pleasures usually reserved for the Irish Republican Army."

Arthur face-palmed.

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O.o Geeze, Winston. Good going, poor Iggy's never going to hear the end of it from Ireland...

For those who may not know: the Irish Republican Army is the IRA.

I actually managed to incorporate _two _quotes into that one. I'm rather proud of myself. When I take the quotes, I actually embellish the stories myself, so the account of what actually happened to make Winston say these things is pretty inaccurate...

But he seriously did say that one evening, after making and testing a model bomb. I found that pretty funny.

Anyways...sorry its so short, again. I tried, I really did. I even tried to put in Iggy's thoughts on Churchill. It just didn't work out too well. Sorry again. The number five might actually take a bit, since I'm going to be writing it from scratch, not just typing up something I wrote a while ago. Sorry in advance, if it takes a while.

Thanks again to all reviewers, I hope you enjoyed it!


	5. File 5

Ah.....the fifth Churchill file. Yays! This is pretty exciting, eh?

Yeah, this one isn't really a quote. Its just what my sister and I thought would have happened when England finally told Winston who he really was.

**The Time Iggy Learned to Just Run With it.**

Arthur was nervous.

The blonde nation was currently standing outside the door to his Prime Minister's office. His _new_ Prime Minister. Winston Churchill.

It had actually already been at least a month since Churchill had come into office. Somehow during that time, Arthur had managed to avoid this meeting,no matter how important it was. He may have been an absolutely invincible English gentleman, but even he got nervous at the prospect of introducing himself as his new leader's country.

They all did, actually. After all, there was always that fear of being rejected. Of being told that they couldn't possibly be the country, the fear of disappointment on their boss's face when they found out. Every country got that, and it usually worked out alright. Usually.

Still, that was the fear that was hanging out in the back of Arthur's mind as he stood outside that door, hand raised in the knocking position. After a moment, he pulled his hand back and began to fix his collar, running a hand through his hair.

He'd worn a white shirt, and his usual green sweater-vest. He would have felt stifled and uncomfortable in a suit, and that was exactly what he hadn't needed. But he'd still put on a tie, trying to look his best.

The faeries had even tried to help him with his hair. Too bad brushes still had almost no effect on it. He'd just have to make do. At least it didn't look as much like bedhead as it did before.

There was another long moment where he stared at the door. He took a deep breath. Raising his hand, he knocked politely. He'd never do what Alfred did, banging on the door until you were afraid it would come off its hinges.

Actually, Arthur wouldn't have been surprised if someone told him that had happened before. The boy didn't know his own strength.

"Come in."

The command broke England from his thoughts, and he walked in, doing his best not to seem nervous. He kept his face controlled, his back straight. Looking nervous would not have made a good impression.

Churchill looked up from the documents on his desk, raising an eyebrow.

"Well!" he said. "Its about time you came in, I thought you were going to wait out there until I went bald. If that was the case, you should have come sooner."

England glanced at his boss's balding head, and had to swallow a laugh.

"Sir, I have come here to tell you some th--"

"Something very important. Yes, so you mentioned in the letter. Why you wrote a letter when you could have simply called me up, I'm still not sure. You said it was a national secret, as well," Churchill interrupted, leaning back a bit in his seat.

Arthur's eyebrow twitched. Fine.

"I'm England," stated bluntly, feeling the weight lift from his shoulders. He wasn't prepared for what happened next.

"Of course you are, you daft boy! Now run along!"

Arthur jumped, staring incredulously at Churchill.

"You...what?"

Churchill huffed, shuffling through a few of the documents on his desk.

"I already knew. You scream 'England' nearly as loud as that blonde twat I had the unfortunate experience to meet in America. Now, run along and do something. The country cannot be idle in a time such as this!"

Not knowing what else to say...England did as he was told.

Just as he closed the door,he blinked, his mind finally catching up.

What the hell just happened?

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Yeah....

How was it?

This is basically how I think it probably happened. XD England never knew what his him, and the great and mighty Churchill was unfazed. After that, Iggy just learned to run with it. XD

Yeah, Winston was talking about Alfred. That part just kind of came out that way. I thought it was pretty funny.

Hitler is still on the rise, so that's why Churchill told England that the country should not be idle. Unlike the previous Prime Minister, Neville Chamerlain, Churchill actually acknowledged the threat Hitler posed.

Anyways, I hope you all liked it. Thanks for reading!


	6. File 6

Wow...its been WAY too long since I've written one of these. .

I've actually been trying to write one from a quote someone gave me, but I was suddenly smacked in the head with writer's block....so I'll just put this up, and hope that I get the other one finished soon. O.o;;

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

How long had it been?

How long had it been since Winston Churchill first sat in this office? Arthur wasn't sure. Absently, he looked around the room, catching all the subtle hints that screamed 'Winston!' yet didn't speak loud enough to be seen at first glance.

At a nod from Churchill, England set the rather large stack of papers down on the desk, holding back a sigh of relief. The stack had been _heavy_.

Once again he glanced around and wondered, 'How long has it been?'

He couldn't remember, right now, but it was probably written down somewhere, in his study. Too bad he didn't have the time to go home and check. He was too busy helping out. With that thought, he turned back to his eighty-year-old Prime Minister.

"Those are all of the paper," he mumbled, knowing what was coming next.

"Well, I should hope so!" Winston said, staring distastefully at the horrifyingly large stack. "These should last me until I retire. Maybe even longer!"

Arthur nodded, a smile tugging at the corner of his mouth. Even after all these years, Churchill's mouth never seemed to slow down. His wit was as fast as ever, though it didn't really show right now. Still, England knew it would probably show itself within the next hour, or so. It always did.

Churchill sighed. "Sit down, sit down," he said, motioning to a chair. "I'm going to have you help me sort through this mess."

England nodded, moving the chair over, and took part of the stack, sifting through to see what was what.

"Anthony is getting impatient," England told Winston, attempting to start a conversation.

Anthony Eden was the man who was to be Churchill's successor, if the man ever retired. So far, Churchill still didn't look like he'd be stepping down too soon, and Eden had been mumbling to himself every time he'd passed by Arthur in the halls.

Churchill sighed a bit, leaning back in his chair. "Yes..." he began. "I must retire soon. Anthony won't live forever." Arthur blinked at this, but Churchill was not done, and a small smile graced his lips as he mentioned, "When I want to tease Anthony, I remind him that Mr. Gladestone formed _his_ administration at the age of eighty-three."

A grin made its way across England's face as he laughed. Down the hall, one Anthony Eden wondered just what was going on in there.

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Yay!

Well...its rather short....but they all are, really. Sorry!

Its been too long...so I wanted to get something quick in here. I actually have a few quotes lined up, now, so hopefully it won't take as long, next time. O.o

Its just been kinda hectic at home. Plus, I've had to get through my writer's block for 'Memories'...yeah. Just not good, all around. -.-;;

Anyways, just so you all know, Mr. William Ewart Gladestone spent a lot of time in politics (to summarize it) and was, at one point, Prime Minister. I'm looking at the dates on the page I'm reading, and it almost looks like it spreads over nearly all of the 19th century. O.o He was born in 1809, and died on 1898. This guy had a pretty long life. Most of his adult years seem to have been in politics. O.o

Anyways.....yeah. That's it for now, folks. I'll try to get something else up soon, though 'Memories' and my APHxTeam Fortress 2 crosser both take priority.


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